


Hard Knocks

by Love (crazylove)



Series: What Happens in Vegas... [3]
Category: American Idol RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-26
Updated: 2010-10-26
Packaged: 2017-10-12 21:34:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/129316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crazylove/pseuds/Love
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was just a bad day. Nothing Matt couldn't handle.</p><p> </p><p>*minor depictions of violence*</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hard Knocks

Matt's shift ended at 6am but he went a little longer because he sensed that someone somewhere was enjoying it. His fingers moved over the keys smoothly and effortlessly. It wasn't a song that anybody knew. Matt didn't even know it. He was making it up on the spot. But it felt _right_ , like just what everyone needed as Maria was setting up the breakfast buffet and the guys shifted in their seats, impatient for the next set of girls.

Matt didn't love it there. He didn't think anyone loved it at Marty's... not even Marty himself. But it was a job, a nice job where he got to play the piano in between sets and people made requests and tipped him. They kept the place fairly clean and the girls were really friendly. Sometimes Matt played a song for one of their strip routines. The girls loved it but the customers didn't so Marty told him to cool it with that.

When he stopped playing he got a smattering of applause. That was pretty good. Matt stood up and rifled through the tip jar on top of the piano. It wasn't a bad night, especially for a Sunday. Well now it was Monday morning, the time when most people with a regular nine-to-five were just waking up and brewing their homemade coffee. Time didn't matter at Marty's.

Matt stuffed the bills in his wallet and put the random coins in the back pocket of his jeans. Sapphire's music started. He looked up at her strutting across the catwalk in a sapphire blue robe. She gave him a wink before she ripped it open. Matt liked how her lingerie was always so sparkly.

"Hey Matty," Donna said, coming over and ruffling his hair. He smiled a put an arm around her. The strippers were all really friendly which was not true at all strip joints.

"Hey girl," Matt said, pulling her in for a quick squeeze. "I saw you up there, working that thing. When did you finally learn how to clap it?"

"Oh, Jasmine taught me," Donna said. "It took some work but holy hell, my tips doubled."

"Next time I'll give you a beat," Matt said. He swayed his hips into her playfully and clapped his hands a couple of times to some beat he had in his head. "You can work it like that."

Donna laughed and pushed him away. "I'll keep it in mind, Matt. See you tomorrow night?"

"Uh, Wednesday," Matt said but that reminded him that he needed to check the schedule. Hopefully someone would want off some night so he could pick up some extra shifts. Matt had been trying to get a gig playing at one of the more reputable casinos, preferably on the Strip, but those jobs were hard to come by. You had to know somebody that knew somebody that knows somebody.

Matt didn't have it like that.

"I told you," Marty said, facing the TV screens as Matt walked into his office. Marty's office was in the back of the small club. He had cameras everywhere, even in the stripper's dressing room. Matt tried not to look over there.

"Don't play your own crap," Marty said in his thick Russian accent. "Nobody wants to hear that shit."

Matt smiled sheepishly. Marty could always tell, somehow.

"I did it after my shift," Matt protested weakly. "I was off the clock."

Marty turned away from the TVs long enough to glare. He was old but Matt had no idea how old. He could be anywhere from 40 to 70. He just had that hardened look on his face, a face that had been through a lot and it had aged him and made him ageless at the same time. His hair was brown, molded to his head. It never moved.

"Wait," Matt said, after scanning that week's schedule. "Hey, Marty... why does Adriana have Wednesday night?"

"I gave Adriana your shift," Marty said. Matt waited for more even though he knew there wasn't going to be any more. He took a deep breath, let it out slowly.

"But Marty," Matt said. He had to word this carefully because it was very easy to get Marty mad. "Adriana doesn't know half-- she doesn't know one-third the songs--"

"Adriana show tits," Marty said. "Customers like that."

Matt gritted his teeth together but still managed a smile. "I don't have any tits," he said.

Marty glanced away from the TVs long enough to look Matt up and down and then sneered at him. Matt crossed his arms over his chest.

"Sorry," Marty said in a voice that had nothing to do with "sorry."

"Please," Matt said. He didn't want to beg but Wednesday was a really good night. Lots of business men dropped by before their conferences started in fancy Vegas casinos in the morning. "You know that I'm better than her."

"It is done," Marty said. He turned to Matt again, fully swung his chair around now. He was wearing the same thing he did every night, a black short sleeve dress shirt and black slack.

"Unless," Marty said. "You want to show me how much you like Wednesday."

He reached for the fly of his slacks, pulling the zipper done. Matt watched him for a moment. Then he walked out of the room.

He had to find a new gig for Wednesday. Maria was waiting for him at the door like she usually did with a sampling of the breakfast buffet neatly prepared in a Styrofoam container. Matt was a big fan of the french toast sticks.

"Thanks, Maria," Matt said. He took the box and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Don't come back," Maria said firmly. She was older Hispanic woman, kind enough to be someone's favorite grandma. She said that every night Matt was there. It didn't work.

Matt liked Vegas in the early morning. The sun was coming up behind all the buildings but it wasn't blazing hot yet. Things were quiet, mostly, and it felt like a peaceful place. He parked his car in the cheap lot that was a few blocks away. It was a little dangerous to walk the path at night but he felt safe in the morning. He waved at the usual crew. There were some hookers, a few homeless people and his boy Larry who was always on his way to work as a janitor at the casino up the street.

He got to his car and tried not to yawn. The food was best hot so he ate it as soon as he sat down behind the steering wheel. He kept his red bull stored in his glove compartment. It wasn't really cold but he chugged it anyway. He had to keep going.

Monday's were busy days. That was good because Matt needed to work to make money. His parents thought moving to LA was a mistake but Vegas had been the big one. Matt remembered when he first moved out there with his buddy Chris Richardson. They had a really sweet condo with their own pool _and_ a pool room. He remembered going out every night with record execs and the latest radio stars. Matt was never _not_ performing. He and Chris sang their songs 24/7, Matt on the piano or on the drums, constantly, and he knew they were good. They were being peddled as songwriters and producers but eventually they would get the chance to record their own stuff. It was a good life, a good, busy life and Matt loved it. He knew he was going to make it in music. He always knew it, deep down in his soul. It hadn't worked out in LA but then they hooked up with these people and now they were in Vegas and they were living the dream. Matt kept hounding their mentors, asking what the next step was. He was ready, he was willing to work very hard. They lived a good life for six wonderful months.

Then it all fell apart.

Matt couldn't even explain how it happened exactly but of course it was a scam. They poured their own money into everything that they did--why not? It was an investment!-- and then everyone disappeared, the parties stopped, the performances stopped, the condo was sold to somewhere else and Chris and Matt were on their own.

Chris was angry. Really angry. There were days when he couldn't speak. Literally everything was gone. They had to start all over again.

Matt thought about going home but he couldn't bear the phone call. Besides what did Michigan have to offer him? At least in Vegas there was a _chance_ of a second chance. It was a performance town. The right people were there. He knew it. He just had to find them.

All their old contacts were gone. It turned out that all their old friends were not really their friends. Chris managed to find a steady job as a casino floor manager at the Stratosphere. Matt went through a variety of jobs at a variety of places. He wanted to keep performing. That was the most important thing.

It was the hardest challenge of all.

Still, they were doing it. They managed to keep their head above water. Then Chris got laid off and rent money was a little tighter. Matt kept working, he kept performing, he kept writing in his spare time. He wasn't going to give up on this dream. Not when it was what he was born to do.

Chris collected unemployment and looked for another job while Matt did everything he could to make some money. He was coming off another rejection after he auditioned for a piano position at a lounge when he got approached by a recruiter from anytimefun.com. The lounge seemed impressed by his playing skills but they weren't amused when they found out he really couldn't read music. Camming wasn't something Matt never thought he would have considered otherwise but in that moment he was just in a weird mood. He liked that anytimefun was based locally in Las Vegas and it had a headquarters and everything. At first he didn't really do anything on cam but you got paid based on popularity and you only got viewers if you gave them a good show. So Matt started putting on a show and it wasn't too bad. Sometimes he kind of liked it. He felt kind of close to some of his regulars. They would listen if he wanted to rant about something which was nice. Then he'd come for their enjoyment. It seemed like a win-win situation. His anytimefun money was rent so he decided to visit the offices that morning to pick up his check.

"You are going to hate me," Antonella, the secretary, said as soon as Matt walked into the modest office. "Please don't hate me."

"What is going on, girl?" Matt asked. He leaned over the counter and peered down at Antonella sitting behind the desk. She offered him a chupa-chupa. He took it and gave her a look.

"That bad, huh?" he said, unwrapping the sucker before he stuck it in his mouth,

"We can't pay you today, Matt," Antonella said. Her big brown eyes were full of sympathy. "They put a freeze on our accounts. It's an investigation about an under-ager."

Matt sucked on the sucker, then removed it from his mouth with a sigh. "Oh," he said. "Shit."

"Yeah, shit is right," Antonella said. "I don't know how they keep sneaking in here. If we get busted this is our third violation. I'm already looking for a new position. You should, too. There's plenty of cam sites, Matt."

Matt shrugged. "I guess," he said. But he liked that this one was local and he got to know the people there. He just didn't want to be another screenname on a webpage with a webcam. It was weird but that was how he felt about the whole thing. It also took him a while to get to pay grade he earned at anytimefun. He didn't want to start all over again at the bottom.

"Of course, your regulars are going to miss you," Antonella said, smiling again. "How's Kara been lately?"

Matt snorted. KaraDoubleD was pretty much his only client that was a woman.

"I don't know," he said. "I might log on tonight. She's been emailing me. Our hours are still being logged, right?"

"Yeah, but don't waste too much time, really, Matt. This is the inside scoop. I don't know if you're ever going to see the money."

Matt took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He couldn't get caught up in this now. At least they were set for the month with his paycheck from two weeks ago. Matt crunched on his sucker and shrugged.

"Thanks for the straight talk," Matt said. "Can I text you later and see where we stand?"

"Anytime. You should ever text me for a drink. I've heard excellent reviews about how you cam. I bet you're even better in person."

Matt couldn't help rolling his eyes. "Oh, stop," he said. "I'll get drinks with you anytime. Talk to you later."

The camming wasn't a secret. It was the Internet after all. It was Vegas. Hell, anytimefun had a freaking _catalog_ they circulated around the city with Matt's face in it. But it was still weird when people referenced his cam shows or indicated that he thought he might be good at sex because of it. Matt wasn't sure if that was true. He didn't really have real sex anymore. He didn't have the time.

Well, that was untrue. Matt smiled as he walked back to his car. There was a guy about a month ago. Matt remembered noticing him at the bar. Matt was drunk but he still could appreciate the guy's nice arms in that black t-shirt. He wouldn't ever forget his name. Anoop. He'd never heard of it before. Anoop was an incredible kisser and a really good fuck. Matt had a nice kind of soreness in the morning that was better than how he felt after the dildos. He even cuddled with Matt after they were done which was probably the best part. Matt thought about that as he drove back to his apartment. Anoop stroking his hair. He left early that morning. He just didn't want Anoop to wake up in the morning and look at Matt with a face full of regret. It would have killed him. Anoop seemed like a nice guy. He had a nice apartment and a closet full of business suits.

Matt didn't belong in that place.

He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel, stuck in some morning traffic. People in Vegas had places to go too. It wasn't all gambling and glamour. Matt figured he could go home, get a couple of hours of sleep in, make some phone calls, do some camming maybe and then go to his gig at Caesar's which he was excited about. He was playing an open mic there. It could be a lucrative audition for a position somewhere. Eight o'clock couldn't come fast enough.

Matt and Chris' apartment was a few miles away from the nice suburbs which meant that they weren't that nice. Matt rolled his window down as he drove down the familiar streets. It was quickly warming up outside but Matt liked to save gas by using as little air conditioning as possible.

He took a detour on the way back home. The melody he made up at Marty's just wouldn't leave his head. He didn't tell anyone, not even Chris, but he put half of his tips that he made at Marty's in a secret fund for a piano. He had always wanted his own, a nice baby grand to put in the formal living room of his future house. He didn't know how long it would take but he'd get there someday. There was an instrument store not far from the apartment and Matt stopped there often. Randy smiled at him when he walked through the twinkling front doors.

"Hey, dawg!" Randy said, cheerfully. "What's going down, baby?"

"Not much," Matt said. He slapped Randy's hand when he walked over to him sitting near the cash register. "Thought I might try a little something something out. Do you mind?"

Randy shook his head. "You know I don't mind when it's the real deal playing, baby. Do your thing. You might drum me up some business."

Matt grinned, making his way over to his favorite piano, a nice black Yamaha. He sat down and cracked his knuckles. "I'll see what I can do," Matt said, flashing Randy a smile. "Just for you."

Playing was the best way for Matt to release all his stress. He just poured it into the music and used that negative energy to make something beautiful. He had his iPhone on top of the piano, recording everything. Maybe he'd play it for Chris later and they could write some lyrics together. They hadn't done that in a long time.

After about 45 minutes Matt decided to get out of there. He gave Randy a hug before he left.

"Keep your head up, dawg," Randy said. "You the real deal. That's the truth. You got more talent in those fingers than 100 regular people. Don't ever forget it."

Matt felt warm and happy like he did when people complimented him like that. "Thanks, Randy," he said. "I'll see you."

He was feeling good when he finally got back to the apartment.

Until he saw all his stuff on the lawn.

It was literally on the lawn. There wasn't even that much lawn. Just a patch of grass before the dirt hit the sidewalk but his clothes were there. His laptop. His keyboard. And now someone was carrying out his laundry hamper. Matt parked in his usual spot without even realizing it because he was too busy staring. His driving had gone on autopilot. That was his _stuff_.

He recognized the people carrying it out. They were part of the maintenance crew.

Then he noticed Chris, standing off to the side, both hands on top of his shaved head.

Matt jumped out of the car and ran over to him.

"Chris!" he said. "What happened? What's going on? Are you alright?"

He put his hand on Chris' shoulder. Chris jumped. Then he stared at Matt like he was seeing him for the first time.

"I'm sorry, man," Chris said. "I am _sorry_!"

"What happened?" Chris looked so freaked out that Matt wanted to give him a hug but he couldn't really move. Everything was outside. What happened to their apartment?

"It's over," Chris said. "It's over, it's over, it's over. I just needed one more good hand. I had it... and then... I could have doubled it but-- the dealer gave me a bad hand!"

"What are you talking about, Chris?" Matt placed his hands on Chris' shoulders and tried to look him in the face but his eyes were darting all around. Matt squeezed Chris' shoulders, trying to bring him back to earth. Was he high?

"I've been working on it," Chris said. "I've been dealing with this. It just... it's going to happen, Matt. I'm going to fix this!"

"What are you talking about?" Matt repeated again. "What's going on with our stuff?"

"You're evicted," said one of the maintenance guys, passing by again with some more of Matt's stuff.

"What?" Matt said. He actually gasped. "But how? Chris, I gave you my half! I... don't we have some notice? How could this just happen _today_?"

"I tried to tell you, man," Chris said. He clutched at Matt's shirt. Matt let him go. "I tried. I was going to make it back. I was _winning_ , I really was, Matt."

Matt swallowed and stepped back. "Wait?" he said, slowly. He knew Chris liked to spend some of his free time in the casinos but he had no idea about this. "You didn't pay the rent? You haven't been paying the rent for how long? Have we... you knew we were getting evicted and you didn't tell me?"

"I was going to pay them, I swear," Chris said. "I'll give you all your money back. Just give me a _week_!"

Matt stepped away again. How could he be so stupid? But Chris was his friend, his partner. He trusted him. Now they were being kicked out of their apartment and Chris had pissed Matt's money away in gambling for who-knows how long.

It felt like being scammed all over again.

"Matt!" Chris said. "Do you have anything... maybe... I feel lucky today, maybe I can fix it right now."

Matt shook his head. "Oh my God, Chris," he said, quietly. He knew he was hardly ever home but how could he miss this? He really was an idiot. He turned around and looked at his stuff on the ground. It was everywhere. It felt overwhelming. He didn't even have room in his car for it all.

There was no fixing this.

Matt grabbed his keyboard and stuffed it in his trunk, along with a bunch of clothes. He took his laptop before anyone could steal it and his beautiful webcam. There were probably legalities to deal with and he had so much more stuff but what was he going to do? He couldn't afford storage for it anyway. Hell, he needed to find another place to _live_ right now.

Matt didn't even want to breathe the same air as Chris at the moment. He got in the car without looking with everyone else and drove away.

He'd never been so angry in his life but he was mostly angry with himself. He should have made sure the rent was paid. He wondered how many eviction notices they got. There he was off in Vegas La-La Land playing the pinao at a _strip club_ and pretending it was Carnegie-fucking-Hall while his own real life was falling apart. He was fulfilling the fantasies of strangers instead of paying attention to his own reality.

The evidence presented itself to him over and over again. Matt Giraud was a fool.

He drove around aimlessly for a long time. He had plenty of friends but there was nowhere he really wanted to go. He didn't want to talk about it. What Matt needed to do was find a place to stay that night but that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. Maybe he would just sleep in his car. It was a very Vegas thing to do.

Matt almost forgot about the open mic gig. He raced over there around 7:30 to sign up for his spot. The woman at the sign up table snapped her gum and glared at him. Matt put on his best smile. He had to put the eviction fiasco thing out of his mind and focus on the gig.

"Hey," he said. "Matt Giraud. I'm playing piano tonight and singing. You got a special song?"

He grinned. The girl didn't grin back.

"Giraud," she said, butchering his last name even though he had just said it correctly two seconds ago. "Yeah, you still need to pay the 250."

Matt felt his smile waver but he managed to keep it up, bravely. "Uh... you know, Damien? He said he'd get the fee waived for me."

Damien was one of his regulars on the cam. A real nice guy. He talked to Damien and that's all they did, usually, Matt just had to be naked. He was pretty supportive about Matt's singing career and he knew the person in charge of the open mic. It was supposed to be taken care of.

The girl continued to glare at him. "That doesn't happen here. So either pay up or get out."

"But, Damien--" Matt started. The girl actually snapped her fingers in his face.

"Look, nobody knows no Damien," she said. "So give me the money or get out of here!"

Matt felt like flipping the table over. Instead he turned around and walked out.

He had to stay positive. This open mic was a big deal. Maybe Damien was going to drop by. Matt would recognize him anywhere. He stood outside the doors of the lounge and watched everyone who went inside. He leaned against the wall and just stayed there until after ten o'clock. The open mic had been going on for 2 hours. Nobody was particularly good from what he could hear, not like he was. That wasn't Matt being conceited, it was just a fact. But two hours later he was still standing there, not playing and there was no Damien.

It was time to give up.

Matt thought about driving to Marty's and trying to snipe the late night shift but in the end he couldn't do it. So he drove up the Strip slowly, looking at all the lights like a tourist. Vegas really was a beautiful place. There were so many unique people, so many places to go, so much to do. Matt loved the hustle and bustle, the activity, the way the city never slept. It was much truer in Vegas than in New York. In the casinos there weren't any windows or clocks. Time seemed to stop. It was easy to get caught up in it all, the promise of fame and fortune and riches if you hit that next bet just right.

He bet that was what happened to Chris. He wondered what was happening to him.

Matt remembered Crossroads as he happened to drive by. His last time there was the first time but it was a good time, especially the end of the night. And the karaoke was fun. He wondered if they were doing karaoke that night. It would be nice to sing something silly.

He parked and walked inside. It was a Monday night so nobody was really there. Matt didn't mind. It was nice to just be around a few people. He sat down at the bar. Nobody really glanced at him except Kris, the cute bartender in the tight t-shirt. Matt remembered him from last time. He spelled his named different from his former roommate Chris. Matt could tell from the name tag on Kris' shirt.

"Hey," Kris said, walking over to him. "Long time, no see. How are you?"

"Pretty shitty," Matt confessed. It was easy to be honest with bartenders. Kris nodded like he understood.

"You want a drink?" Kris asked. "Might help. Might not." He shrugged but Matt was nodding.

"Yeah," he said. "I'll have a Jack and Coke."

He watched Kris' arms as he shook the drink in the metal canister. That helped Matt's mood a little bit but he still didn't know where he was sleeping that night. He could always get a cheap hotel. Kris gave him a kind smile as he set the drink down in front of him.

"We're going to make you feel better," Kris said. "That's a promise."

Matt smiled back and took the first drink. He hadn't even really eaten that day so the alcohol would definitely help.

He sipped his drink and stared at the TV behind the bar. It was playing a football game that didn't interest Matt but at least it gave him something to focus on. He started another drink and his mind began to wander until he heard Kris say, "Hey Anoop!"

Matt nearly broke his neck as he whipped his head around to see who Kris was talking to. He was fairly sure there could only be one person in the world or at least in Vegas with a name like Anoop and his suspicions were confirmed when he saw Anoop settling on a bar stool not too far away.

Matt couldn't believe it. He'd been hoping to run into this guy again for like a month and here he was. Maybe something was finally going right. Anoop was just as hot as he remembered him--thick black hair, pouty lips. His skin was so smooth. He couldn't wait. He jumped out off the bar stool and walked over to him.

"Anoop," Matt said, smiling. "Wow. It's been a while. How's it going, man? It's good to see you again!"

Anoop glanced over at him and at first he looked a bit startled but then his face changed and his expression was somewhat blank. Matt stood there, feeling more uncomfortable by the moment. Finally, Anoop opened his mouth.

"Excuse me?" he said.

Matt's heart dropped into his stomach. This couldn't be happening.

"Uh..." Matt said. Kris set Anoop's drink down and gave them both a curious look. "We met... a few weeks ago. Uh, I'm Matt?" Shit shit shit. He really was a fool. Anoop had been drunk, too. Maybe even drunker than Matt. Maybe he didn't _remember_. Why did Matt just assume that he would? Matt was probably a pretty forgettable fuck when he wasn't pretending for cash.

A sick feeling crawled up his throat.

"Matt?" Anoop said. He shook his head. "I don't... I mean..."

"It's okay," Matt said, quickly. "My bad. I just... I'm sorry."

Matt turned around and walked back to the other side of the bar. He was sure that everyone in the club had just seen him crash and burn. He tossed back the rest of his drink and threw a 20 on the counter that he could not afford to throw away considering that he was currently homeless. Then he left.

It was a cold night. Matt had a sweatshirt in his car but he didn't feel like getting it. He crossed his arms and walked along in the darkness. Lots of streetlights were out for some reason. Vegas had power problems all the time.

Matt remembered this route. It was the way to Anoop's apartment. He remembered walking with him and pointing out the moon. It was impressive that night, so full and bright and big. Anoop seemed to be impressed as well.

Tonight he couldn't see the moon at all.

Matt sat down on a swing in a park that was probably very pretty in the day time. He was feeling a little dizzy so he didn't want to walk anymore but he wasn't too dizzy to swing. He kicked his legs and pushed back. He couldn't remember the last time he swung. The seat buckled under his weight but the chains held so he kept swinging. He leaned back and pointed his legs straight up at the stars he couldn't see going higher and higher, much higher than he dared as a kid. The seat bounced dangerously but Matt didn't care. He kicked his heels back, swung forward once again, until he noticed that there was somebody standing in front of him.

Matt dropped his legs, pushing his heels against the rubber play surface so he came to a stop.

"Hey," Matt said, squinting in the darkness. They needed to replace the lightbulbs or something. "What's up?"

"Give me your wallet," the guy said and then he pushed Matt backwards off the swing. Matt could hardly believe this was happening as he hit the ground hard enough to knock the wind out of him. The the guy kicked him in the side and right in the head. Matt's vision went white with an explosion of pain. The swing was jerking around wildly above him. The guy got on the ground and punched Matt in the face. He felt it in his eye, his nose, his lip, like the guy had literally bashed his face in and he was scared if he touched himself there he would find that all his features were concave. He would give the guy his meager wallet if he would only give him a chance!

"Hey--" Matt croaked. His mouth was full of blood. He tried to push the guy off. The guy was working on his pants, trying to pull them down without undoing his belt. Matt didn't really know what was happening but he would do anything to make it stop.

"Get off him!" someone yelled, another voice, and then the guy wasn't pulling at Matt's pants anymore. Matt wasn't sure he could see even if he tried but for now he was keeping his eyes closed. He could hear a scuffle and some swearing and then footsteps heading away. He was gone. Matt could tell that much. Still, he wasn't going to get up just yet, not that he could get up if he tried. He'd give the mugger some time to get away. Count to 100 like in Clueless. He wondered if the guy managed to get his wallet after all.

"Matt?" He felt someone kneel beside him and he knew who it was. He started to laugh. He couldn't help it. There was a gentle hand on his shoulder and then the same voice. "Matt, are you okay?"

"Oh, _now_ you remember me," Matt said. He couldn't keep his eyes closed for this and when he opened them he discovered that he could still see and it was indeed Anoop, kneeling there. Anoop pressed his lips together, looking embarrassed.

"Sorry about that," he said, finally.

"It's okay," Matt said. His face hurt so much it felt like it was on fire. He was pretty sure he was bleeding from everywhere. "I think you made up for it."

"There's been... that's guy been around lately," Anoop said. "I should have warned you."

Matt wanted to shake his head but he couldn't move it. He couldn't move at all. Maybe he was paralyzed. The guy had really kicked him. Maybe he snapped his neck somehow.

"We should get you to a hospital," Anoop said.

"No," Matt said. He gasped when a new wave of pain overtook him. Anoop squeezed his hand.

"Someone needs to look at your face," Anoop said, firmly.

"I can't go to a hospital," Matt said. He laughed, weakly. It was the only thing that was going to get him through this. "I don't have insurance. I don't even have an _address_."

"I'm sure we can do something about that," Anoop said. He really didn't understand. Matt just laughed some more. Now his nice shirt was probably ruined by blood. It was the perfect way to end a fabulous day.

"I'm getting up," Matt said. He closed his eyes and tried to move. It didn't work. He held up his hands in the air.

"Anoop, please," he said. "Help me up."

"You should lay here until the ambulance comes," Anoop said. "I can call an ambulance."

"There isn't going to be an _ambulance_ ," Matt spat out. He didn't always feel like being friendly and joking all the time. "Come on, Anoop."

Anoop didn't say anything for a few moments. Matt opened his eyes. There was still no sign of the moon in the sky, no stars, but Anoop was right there.

"Fine," Anoop said, quietly. "But you're coming to my place."

It took them three tries before Matt was able to stand up and then he was very dizzy and had to stand in place for a while. Blood was dripping from everywhere. He was sure it was coming down from the side of his head, possible his ear. Anoop said he really couldn't see anything in the dark. He used the bottom of his own shirt to wipe the blood from Matt's eyes.

"It's a couple of blocks," Anoop said, like he hadn't taken Matt there before. "Think you can make it?"

Matt nodded. He didn't really have a choice.

They walked slowly, Anoop's arm around him. Matt thought he was becoming numb to the pain or something. It all mingled together in his head. Anoop didn't really say anything, he was probably too busy doing his best to keep Matt upright. Matt was trying hard too.

"Wait," Matt said. He had to stop. "Sorry, Anoop. I think I'm going to puke."

He threw up in somebody's lawn, the alcohol burning twice as bad on the way up. That was going to be a lovely surprise in the morning.

Anoop rubbed his back patiently as he was heaving. "You really need to go to the hospital, Matt," he said. "You probably have a concussion if you're throwing up."

Matt shook his head and wiped his mouth off when he was finished. "I'm fine," he said, even though he felt like he was going to pass out.

They made it to Anoop's apartment. It was still as lovely as Matt remembered, with a nice couch and a flat screen TV. Anoop made Matt lay down on that nice couch. Matt took his shirt off first so he wouldn't get blood all over it. He took off his shoes too. It was just like the first time he was here, except that time they went straight to Anoop's bed. He closed his eyes until Anoop came back with bandages and damp napkins and a couple of ice packs.

"How bad does it hurt?" Anoop asked. He pressed a wad of napkins against a cut above Matt's eye. Matt sucked in his breath.

"A lot," Anoop answered. "I have Vicodin. But I really think--"

"Please, Anoop," Matt said. "If I die it'll be my own fault, okay? I won't haunt you or anything. I promise."

He saw Anoop crack a smile. It was just a flash but it made Matt feel better.

"You don't need to take care of me," Matt said. "Just let me sleep it off. I'll be out of your hair in the morning--"

"No," Anoop said, cutting him off. He moved his hand away from Matt's face. Matt looked at him, curiously.

"I don't want you to leave in the morning," Anoop said, quietly. He went back to cleaning off Matt's face and gave Matt a ice pack to hold against the side of his head.

Matt ended up dozing off or passing out--he wasn't sure which--but Anoop woke him up a little bit later.

"Hey," Anoop said, peering at Matt. His right eye was practically swollen shut by now but his left was was okay. "What's your name?"

"I should be asking you," Matt said. His voice was raspy, his head still hurt a lot, but other than that he was okay.

Anoop laughed. "Touche," he said. "I guess you haven't lost your memory yet. I'm going to keep waking you up every couple of hours. Just to make sure you're okay."

"I'm okay," Matt said. Looking at Anoop really did help, especially since he was smiling at him.

"We have to keep ice on that eye," Anoop said. He helped Matt up so he could go to the bathroom and even gave him a toothbrush to use. Luckily, Matt didn't feel nauseous anymore. When he was done in the bathroom he was ready to lay down on the couch again but Anoop led him to his bed.

"It's more comfortable," Anoop said. "I also have a guest room... if you want."

Matt wanted to just lay down again so he didn't protest. He didn't remember Anoop's bed being so soft but he did remember the yellow walls.

"I never would have guessed you like yellow so much, Anoop," Matt said.

Anoop rolled his eyes. "It came like this. I've just been too lazy to change it."

Matt thought the yellow made the room seem brighter. He laid back against a pillow and put the ice pack against his eye.

"I like it," Matt said. "It's bright! It's fun."

"Well," Anoop said. "Maybe I'll keep it."

He grabbed Matt's belt. Matt figured that Anoop had done a lot for him that day. If he wanted to have a quickie right then he wouldn't protest, as long as he didn't have to move. Everyone in Vegas was looking for sex, even nice guys like Anoop. But Anoop just helped him get out of his pants. Then he pulled the covers up over Matt and sort of tucked him in.

"Is that okay?" Anoop asked. When Matt opened his eyes again Anoop really did look worried and concerned about him. Matt couldn't remember the last time someone looked at him that way. He tried a smile but his mouth wasn't working. It felt like everything was rushing up at once. This had been a truly awful day and Matt couldn't just go home because he didn't have _anywhere_ to go.

The tears tasted even saltier in his mouth than the blood. He couldn't believe he was crying. He wanted to apologize but he couldn't speak.

Anoop didn't say anything. He climbed in the bed beside Matt and put his arms around him, holding him close. Matt wondered how much people would pay just to let someone hold them like this. Right now it felt like it was worth all the money in the world. Matt should start a holding business. It would be better than porn. He smiled at his own ridiculous thoughts through his tears. Anoop kissed his hair and then his temple.

"Matt," Anoop said, softly, pressing his nose against the side of Matt's face. Matt knew it should hurt but it didn't. He could feel Anoop's breath against his ear as he spoke. "I didn't really forget you. I've been thinking about you ever since that night. I can't get you out of my mind. I don't know... I just... I felt like I wanted to get to know you. I mean, I still feel that way. I thought I screwed it up but...I mean...Vegas is such a shit town, sometimes. It was like you could really make me smile."

Matt's heart was racing and this time it was a good feeling. He couldn't believe Anoop was saying that to him and holding him so tightly. It was a fantasy that no webcam could ever fulfill.

"I know I'm being forward," Anoop said. "But... I don't usually do this sort of thing..." He trailed off. Matt's heart was still racing but now he was a little more unsure.

"Look, Matt," Anoop said. "You're welcome to stay if you need a place to stay."

"Is it because I'm crying?" Matt joked. He couldn't help it. He wiped his cheeks, carefully. "Wow, Anoop, that's so nice of you but--"

"Please," Anoop whispered. "Stay for a little while."

Matt knew what the right thing was. He knew what was polite. He knew he should argue and turn Anoop down because he was still practically a stranger even if he was really hot and nice and this was Vegas after all so you really couldn't _trust_ anyone but the truth was that his head hurt, his whole body hurt and he was tired, he was so tired of a lot of things and he'd been thinking about Anoop.

He wanted to get to know him, too.

"Okay," Matt said.

"Do you need a tissue?" Anoop said.

Matt sniffed nosily and then chuckled a little. "I'll be okay." he said. "I used your sheets."

He really did wipe his face against Anoop's nice, clean sheets than smelled like they had just come out of the dryer. Anoop wrapped his arms around him, wrapped his legs around him, kissed the back of Matt's neck. It didn't hurt at all.

"What do you want to know first?" Matt asked. It was mostly a joke but Anoop seemed serious.

"What's your last name?" Anoop asked.

"Giraud," Matt said. "Matt Giraud. Don't forget my name this time, Anoop Desai."

Anoop laughed softly in his ear. "You remembered," he said.

Matt felt more relaxed than he had in a while when he fell asleep again. There was a lot more to know about Matt but he figured he would have time to tell Anoop later. True to his word, Anoop woke him up a couple of hours later. Matt opened his eyes. His swollen eye felt better. He could almost see in the dark, aided by the yellow walls.

"Hey," Matt said, turning around to face Anoop. Anoop was still lying close to him. "What's my name?"

He felt Anoop grin, saw a flash of his straight, white teeth as he parted his lips.

"Matt," Anoop said. "Matt Giraud."

"Good job," Matt whispered. He rested his head on Anoop's bare chest and felt Anoop's fingers in his hair, still soft just like he remembered, as he closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep.


End file.
